My Girlfriend Continues to Get More Animals
Very quick back story. My girlfriend and I have been dating for 10 months now, everything has been going pretty well for the most part. We're both 19 and about to enter our 2nd year of college.
Her "honeymoon" period had ended much earlier than my "honeymoon" period which had caused for some conversations and stupid arguments that we both hated. But I have now accepted the fact that it's not going to be like it was when we started dating and things feel like they;re going in the right direction.
However one thing that has been bothering me as of late is the way she is with her friends compared to the way she is with me. I'm pretty much her only guy friend, she really doesn't have guys that she can call her friend, at all. They're basically all girls.
But there's a difference between the way she acts with me and the way she acts with them. On Facebook or Twitter whenever she's commenting or responding to a friend she's doing it like this "OMG BAHAHA that is SO FUNNY!!!" - Like it shows she cares or like she acknowledges them at least.
But when I interact with her she always just "likes" it on Facebook or respond with something small on Twitter.
The same thing is true for when I see her in person. If she hasn't seen a friend in say over a week, when they see each other they'll be like "OMGGG I missed you soo much!" and hug and you know do all that stuff.
But like if I don't see her for a week or two and I see her, she'll just like wave and a hey, maybe a hug or kiss if I initiate it.
Obviously she's going to act differently with her friends than me, I understand that. But like the extreme difference sometimes makes me wonder like if she really cares about me or this relationship. I sometimes feel like she doesn't.
And I don't know if this helps, but she is a somewhat private person as am I. We both don't like too much PDA besides like holding hands, so idk could be she doesn't want her relationship on every social media site? But how do you explain her reaction after not seeing me for a while?
#2
10 years ago
#3
10 years ago
#4
8 years ago
Hey, I'm in the exact same situation right now and I wanna know what you did, its really hard because my friends say that breaking up with her is the best option, but i still love her a lot and i dont know what to do. It's really hard for me to leave her because we've been together for so long.
#5
8 years ago
Hey, I'm in the exact same situation right now and I wanna know what you did, its really hard because my friends say that breaking up with her is the best option, but i still love her a lot and i dont know what to do. It's really hard for me to leave her because we've been together for so long.
#6
8 years ago
I dnt think she doesnt love you,or she doesnt care about the relationship, as u said she is a private person and relationships are very private issues, if you want her to do that with you talk to her, am sure she can explain. People just have different ways of showing affection to different people.
#7
8 years ago
right now same thing is happening to me,since we starter,she will act completely diferent with friends than with me,the last two week has been the worst,i been ignoring her to try to end up with this but last three days i been trying to reach her and ask her to meet up and say always that she had something to do with friends,maybe tomorrow and that hurt me a lot,at some point she would come back,when her friends find a relation or something but it would be too late,and the funny thing is that she is older than me..
#8
8 years ago
dude, we are in the same boat man....
#9
8 years ago
Same situation here when we first started we goes pretty well but after awhile I start finding that she is way more happy with her friend than me, the way she act, and talk. Sometime she even cancel out our date just because one of her friends asked her out. Is confusing I think maybe I been to clingy to her
#10
8 years ago
I think the best way you can work through this, is to tell her how you feel. I also act all hype with my friends, but a lil less with my boyfriend, matter of facts, I don't even comment on his statuses on FB.
If it bothers you so much, then talk it through with her, or maybe try doing more fun stuff with her, get to know what makes her tick. What is it that her friends do, that you don't do. And I think it comes naturally to be more free when you are friends, than your boyfiend.
It could be nothing, but only she know that. I think it has nothing to do with you, but speak to her.Communication should be essential.
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#11
8 years ago
#12
8 years ago
Im in a very similar situation, but i am currently recovering from an operation on my bck which left me off work for 3 weeks so far and my girlfriend of 2 years hasnt even bothered to come and visit me! She emailed me the first week, simply asking how I am, telling me about stuff she is getting up to, then the next week she didnt contact me from Sunday until Saturday at all, the whole time adding a ton of new friends and different facebook status updates. So I got really annoyed and posted up a a quote about waisting your time on things that dont matter and people who think you dont matter, she respnded the next day with 7 emails pretending to have tried ringing me all week, even lying about how I must have loads of missed calls from her, and as soon as I replied she read them (obviously put her mind at ease that i wsnt angry per se)and didnt bother replying again and its now been two days...she's added 50 or so new friends and even made an events page for something she will be doing in the near future. I didnt want to mention anything about visiting me as she already knows she is more than welcome as she gets along with my family fine (actually my mum invited her to visit me about 2 weeks before the operation to which she just laughed nervously as if she had no intentions of comming round), but I want it t be off her own back that she turns up. well its my birthday a week this tuesday, she forgot it last year and if she forgets it this year Im walking (she even forgot how old i was lol. If we dont see eachother for weeks she will barely notice nd i always have to travel over to her place to see her, she never comes to my place unless i pay for her taxi..think its time for me to open my fricken eyes maybe! lol just thought i'd add my bit, might make some of you feel a bit better, if not at least im a bit better at typing than 5 minutes ago! 😋
#13
8 years ago
#14
7 years ago
Really ***** when girlfriend cares about facebook friends then one, havent seen here in a while and I can notice she wasnt even excited to see me our 3year anniversary. messed up only cuz I asked her why she still gives more attention to guy friends then me. her respond t hat I want to control her and she punched me in the stomach..cuz i accused her of cheating then left she called me to. go to her house I went we made up had sex. Really cried from what she did to me cant get it off my head our 3 year anniversary but Iam fed up last night same fight cuz of facebook told her to stay with her guys friends iam talking to other girls and to go f**k her mother, I ignored her calls she wants to be a b*tch with me I can be an azzh*le. Iam fed up I dumped her already
#15
7 years ago
I get this, and I want to know how you handled it
#16
7 years ago
the same thing happened to me, I told her about my concern and she gave me the same bullcrap answer she always does and just goes back to doing it and its just been driving me deeper and deeper into the dirt, now I barely even try to do anything for her because shes always ignoring me with her freinds and it has just been hurting me tremendously because this is happening constantly and she is still perfectly happy even though she knows im miserable.
#17
7 years ago
#18
7 years ago
Hey man I'm with you on this. My girlfriend has recently started talking to her guy friend a lot and I try not to let it get to me but its just the little things that I pick up on what makes alarm bells go off in my head. Just the other week, she told me she was too tired to talk that night (we always talk every night) but then the next day I found out that she was talking to her guy friend on Skype until 4 in the morning! I asked her about it, even had the balls to tell her straight up it made me jealous how she acts with him yet her only excuse was "I couldn't sleep and I didn't know if you were awake so I talked to him instead don't worry you have nothing to worry about!". If she couldn't sleep and didn't want to risk waking me up then why did she risk it for him? Its not like I would be mad at my girlfriend for trying to talk to me. Thing is though her guy friend is a complete dick and this isn't just me being jealous cos I asked a few others and they all agreed but my girlfriend doesn't notice it and gets mad at me when I try tell her I don't like him. I honestly don't know what to do anymore, I know that she wouldn't cheat on me or lie to me about it but its constantly on my mind and driving me insane! 😤
#19
7 years ago
Bro, I feel the pain of what you said, and I thought i was in your shoes. What you need to do is sit her down and say exactly what you are afraid of. I know it's hard and you don't want to seem lame, or upset her, but it is the only way... When you do it be sly about it. Say something like , " haha wow you seem to like (guy friend of yours) more than you like me. Haha. (Ect). Sometimes you have to be sneaky with chicks or they will never show their true colors. Sad fact of life. Don't feel bad, they do it to us constantly. A lot of what you described is just that girls like guys, they just enjoy other guys around. Yet another sad fact of life :/ but from what you said, I would try to see if it's one guy in particular she's talking to like that or acting like that to. My girlfriend is 24 and I'm 30, a lot of her friends are guys so she just likes guys. I don't dare say anything lol. But yeah if it was one guy in particular she was "all over " I'd trip. Because I've been cheated on twice before by two girls. Just feel it out, stay calm and nice when you talk to her about it. Don't lose control of your voice or emotions when you talk to her about it..girls freak easy ☹️ it will be cool. It sounds pretty innocent but I'd be disturbed also if that was happening. I'm not on fb anymore so I don't keep track of what my girlfriend does on there because I get jealous easy sometimes because of what happened to me. We have a healthy relationship with a lot of communication going on. Just bring it up, feel out her response, and take it from there. If you bring it up and she freaks, she might be guilty though...just saying. Be careful approaching this I can't stress that enough. Good luck man, and I feel your pain.
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#20
7 years ago
I would let her know how I feel and I would tell her " it's me or your friends" because no guy wants to be treated like he is of no value bud. Honestly as a real woman or lady her desire should be to you, because you are her man. When her period comes on and she has cramps and pains her desire should be to you during those times of her sorrow, but instead she gives her all to her friends like a lesbian. I would slide her man, she not worth your time. She is proving that right now.
#21
7 years ago
Same here my girl do the same like she don't even call or Skype Me... like yesterday she txted me talking about she been in the hospital and and that happen before she told me all of this and when ever she get on the phone she be all imu and blahblah blah i had my phone off and **** 💩 and another boi called he rushing her off the phone tell him that she on Skype with somebody and went back to the phone with this girl and say talking about having some babies then when i got on the phone she start saying i love you BC she though my cousin was one of my friends as girl Thu know I'm going out with her so she keep on saying i love u i love u i love u i love u so i look at it and never respond at all so she got mad and hang up in my face
#22
7 years ago
Dam dud I just don't know what to do 😞 my self
#23
7 years ago
Hey man thanks for the advice, just letting you know that your advice helped a lot so thanks. I actually managed to convince my girlfriend to talk to the guy acting all vulnerable over skype messaging while i was screen sharing (don't ask me how I pulled that off, I have no clue) and ask him for advice on what she should do. He proceeded to slate me heavily, calling me a scumbag and other **** but then also told her to break up with me because he liked her and he would go out with her instead. I was absolutely murderous when i found out and she kind of realised how bad it seemed from my perspective and now she doesn't talk to the guy at all, saying he's way too creepy and pulled a huge ***** move. Took me this long to reply because, to be honest, things have been going so well the whole situation slipped my mind. I finally told her that i had been cheated on in every serious relationship so i was kinda paranoid and since then she has always taken my opinion and perspective into account. Life is good. Thanks, you're a life saver
#24
7 years ago
Your welcome bro think you for being strong
#25
6 years ago
I think if you are here you've either been in the boat, or you are in the boat, or in the water drowning......
same thing is happeneing to me ☹️
#26
6 years ago
Hey guys in my opinion I wouldn't eve bother saying anything I've been with my girlfriend since I was 14 and I am now 20 and she is 19 everything goes good but I have noticed that all of her friendsare literally ***** but I'm close friends with a few not in that kind of way just know the just as long as my gf but any ways she acts flirty when we are with my friends and we all used to smoke but I would get so paranoid because I had a gut feeling she was cheating for about six months but I finally talked to her about it calmy and told her how I felt she then left me because I couldn't trust her come to find out she started talking to another guy and went to homecoming and **** with him and ignored me when I tried talking to her so I kinda gave up until maybe 3 weeks later that didn't last long because he said she was crazy so I'm back with her sorta like she knows I love her but I try to be distant now because of what happened and I don't want to be clingy however I work 50 hours a week with her father and get home late and she works the days I don't work the weekends and she's usually with friends or cancelling on me idk what to do I just think she's with me honestly because I literally do everything for this girl I phone 6 I bought it... You see it you like it I'll buy it... Probably not the best way to be but its just money its materialistic and it means nothing when you have a lot of it lol but I just don't know what to do cause I'll see her for maybe 20 for the week very pathetic I know lol but she seems weird or different its hard to walk away because I do love her a lot but all of my friends say that shecis controlling and a ****... My guess is that she likes the stuff and the money I mean nothing to her anymore like I used to can someone help me with this.. Thank you
#27
6 years ago
I'm in the same situation and don't know what to do I can't sit there and not think about it when she's on her phone and then wen I try and ask her if she still loves me and cares she says why u asking stupid questions
#28
6 years ago
Yo man you can't be asking those kind of questions it reflects badly on you, a woman wants a confident guy and that is like the worst thing you can do. I'd recommend doing what I did, sitting down with her and telling her that you don't like her being on her phone so much when you're together because it feels like you're being pushed aside. Make an agreement with her that you won't use your phone if she doesn't use hers when you guys are together. If she's cool, she'll agree to it and you'll be there thinking to yourself about how silly you were being. If she can't see it that way, then she's just plain rude and if she can't make the small sacrifice to make someone she loves happy then its not worth sticking around for. Good luck, hopefully things get better, ***** being in that situation.
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#29
6 years ago
I don't understand some of this stuff. Like dafuq
#30
6 years ago
Won't don't you understand?
Source: https://www.relationshiptalk.net/my-girlfriend-seems-to-care-more-about-friends-than-me-she-acts-differently-25160024.html
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